This is Chris Tomlin's version of the classic hymn Amazing Grace. We sing this over and over again throughout the ages, at various churches and hear it all over the world. Sometimes we forget exactly what we are singing about. Between the twas and thees and thous, what are we really raising our hands and singing loudly about...Here is another rendition of the song with a more in-depth look at each phrase:
Amazing grace
Unbelievable, shocking, marvelous pardon for everything selfish, prideful, disgusting thing I have done
How sweet the sound
How treasured, how in awe I am of that word, grace.
That saved a wretch like me
That came to rescue, set free, salvaged, defended, an immoral, self-loving, sin-enjoying, God-hating, filthy person like me who found joy in sinning against something so pure and holy
I once was lost, but now I'm found
I once, before now, before that moment was lonely, off-track, fallen between the cracks, hidden, astray, invisible, without, wayward, BUT NOW I'm brought into being, established, brought into the light, a new creation
Was blind, but now I see
Was uncontrolled, unprotected, near-sighted, unthinking, leading nowhere, BUT NOW I have been uncovered, REVEALED, opened, have clarity, perceive with my eyes, pay attention to
'Twas grace that taught my heart to fear
It was that pardon from suffering, that pardon from death, that Someone stuck by me through my pain and still called me Their child that showed, that instructed my heart, my soul, my well-spring of life, my humanity, essence to stand in awe of, revere the Lord
And grace my fears relieved
It was that pardon that my awe and respect for the Lord soothed; It was grace that made me realize what the consequences were and that grace pardoned ME from the road to DEATH
How precious did that grace appear
In my darkest, loneliest moment I was rescued, I was saved.
The hour I first believed
Immediately.
My chains are gone
My restrictions, the things I have been a slave to no longer have power over me,
I've been set free
I've been bailed out, let off the hook, redeemed,
My God, my Savior has ransomed me
My powerful, loving God, My DELIVERER, my defender has bought my freedom, cleared my past, absolved me of blame and responsibility
And like a flood His mercy rains
And like an uncontrollable, powerful, unexpected flood our Judge, our Ancient of Days pardons us from the death penalty
Unending love, Amazing grace
Over and over and over again, eternal love, undeserved freedom and redemption
The Lord has promised good to me
The Giver of all good and perfect things has committed a full, abundant life to me
His word my hope secures
My anticipation is dependent on His truth
He will my shield and portion be
He will be my protection, Guarder of my heart, my security, my defense and every missing piece, my fulfillment
As long as life endures
Forever.
[2x]
My chains are gone
Everything that has kept me from living a FULL life, a content life, a SATISFIED life is gone
I've been set free
I've been untangled, given a new body, a new mind, a new Spirit, and a clean slate
My God, my Savior has ransomed me
This God I had always read and studied about CHOSE ME, gave me a new life, restored me from brokenness, found me WORTHY
And like a flood His mercy rains
No matter what I've done, no matter how many times I've already said sorry, no matter how many times i've said no, He doesn't give up on me, He doesn't leave me like everything the life has to offer does
Unending love, Amazing grace
He doesn't leave, He doesn't condemn you, He calls you His prize, His bride, His child, Unfathomable is this forgiveness He has that He can choose to forget your sin and separate you from it
The earth shall soon dissolve like snow
This life is but a moment.
The sun forbear to shine
The light will cease
But God, Who called me here below
But the Creator Who had a plan for me
Will be forever mine
Will be there for me always
Will be forever mine
Never leave me or forsake me,
You are forever mine
I will never leave You Jesus.
What are YOUR chains? Why is grace so amazing? I know the Lord has saved me from the path I was heading down. He rescued me from death.
Sex outside of marriage can lead to stds, abortion, emotional baggage, depression. Depression can lead to thinking irrationally, and make you contemplate even taking your own life.
Alcohol can grow from a social activity to an escape from the pain. After a night of drinking at the bar, your mind tells you he never loved you and you were never good enough, causing you to think for even a moment, if I were to wreck my car, that'd show him!
Drugs can be a way to chill out or to have fun, but when you start choosing drugs over your family, support system, and friends, your become controlled by them. You can't function or be happy or have fun unless you have smoked, taken that pill, or had that hit. It makes you forget about the past, the present and even the future. When you can't hold that job or pay your bills and every bail out you had deserts you... where are you headed?
You see, I have been a victim of all of these mechanisms Satan uses to steal, kill and destroy.
But AMAZING GRACE! I found the Jesus can renew my body. He can redeem me. He died for me in spite of all the things I've done and let others do to me.
AMAZING GRACE! He washed away all of the abuse, the one night stands, the emptiness, the shame, the ways I had learned to satisfy myself instead of letting Jesus...
AMAZING GRACE I am drug and alcohol free.
AMAZING GRACE I am no longer a slave to sin. The only thing I need is Jesus.
AMAZING GRACE I found "The One" to spend my life with and have a beautiful baby girl, and a family that loves and supports me. I am surrounding by people that love the Lord and challenge me in my faith. I have a job in ministry and other jobs that allow me to do what I love while having time to nurture and grow with my family.
AMAZING GRACE is what I sing, hands lifted high, tears streaming down my face. I do NOT deserve this and I am SO unashamedly thankful!
A compilation of my personal thoughts about God. I just started journaling insights and things God has laid on my heart. Sometimes people only see the outcome of situations and never see the thought process behind it. Here is my mind: sometimes arguing with itself; sometimes confused; sometimes wrong and sometimes right..either way here it is:
Showing posts with label alcohol. Show all posts
Showing posts with label alcohol. Show all posts
Monday, January 16, 2012
Wednesday, November 11, 2009
11 months, 12 days sober
I have heard from wise counsel that "anger stems from hurt," and seeming I get so upset from alcohol, I decided to dig deep and see what is REALLY the source-- why do I "HURT" from alcohol? If you think about where alcohol has gotten you, and who'd you be without it- maybe you can relate; if not, at least you'll have a better understanding of how and why I quit drinking.
You never really realize the affect that alcohol can have on your life. You think you're making "memories" but what if you're really making "scars." From the first sip, you can lose yourself. Not just alcohol, but anything you find JOY in can become a stronghold, "a place that serves as the center of the group," a "refuge", your "support" as the dictionary defines it. Among MANY of these that can take away our focus from the Lord and put it on ourselves, alcohol was my first.
Took away my innocence.
Took away my yes's.
Took away my no's.
My outlet.
Quick Fix.
Numbed the pain.
Fogged their name.
Blurred their face.
Let people touch me in ways only a husband should, and I didn't even KNOW them.
No one knew just "ME"... "sober me."
He didn't love me, swear he did, alcohol pushed me in, got me out, and told me i'd be fine.
Alcohol took the BLAME but also BLAMED me too.
I saw my father cry.
I saw my mother hurt.
It broke my relationship that only sisters can have.
Made me happy, made me mean.
Lost more than I ever gained.
A stronghold- something I couldn't do without.
It got between me and prayer, me and the Word, me and church, me and my God.
Took away my passion for serving the Lord.
Felt vile in the holiness of the Lord and my family.
Locked my lips when I needed to speak and opened them when I should've been silent.
Blinded me from my spiritual gifts and talents and I let such beauty go to waste.
I wasn't fulfilling my purpose.
I wrestle with it EVERYDAY.
Delighted in IT more than in the Lord.
Kept me from the church.
Made me feel GUILTY in God's presence.
Condemned when I made it to church hungover.
Strapped down with heavy burdens, hiding who I had become.
Cried for hours about petty things when my heart used to hurt for bigger issues.
Became consumed with me; selfish.
Backstabbed friends, betrayed loyalty, had no meaning to the word "trust."
Relationships lasted as long as the buzz.
Partied all night with you then took your first love.
The tiniest bit of anger towards someone blew up into words that would scar them for life.
Stole the lime light only to take advantage of kindness, and rob them of meaningful friendships.
Almost gave my life to someone I had spent SO much time with, yet knew NOTHING about them.
Contemplated DYING because of that SAME PERSON that I didn't even KNOW.
Emotions out of control.
Always having to prove something.
Blurred memory- was I safe, did I use protection, did I make that call, did I give that advice?
Reassured someone that taking the life of their unborn child was an ok option.
REGRETS.
Took advantage of the people the genuinely cared about me.
Couldn't hold a job, but didn't have money to support myself.
Friends DIED that I PARTIED with, but NEVER shared Jesus or made SURE that they knew they were going to heaven.
Words I can never unsay. Things I can never undo. Texts/messages I can never unsend.
Ruined the best present a 16yr old new driver could ask for!
Rebelled against leaders that truly had my best interest at heart.
Ruined reputation.
Defiled and exposed the body that God gave me- my temple, His image, His child.
Pursued being an object of desire instead of real relationships.
Flaunted and taunted though I'm taught to conceal.
Warped outlook; future in my hands; put thoughts as a "coke addicted stripper in Vegas" like a dream job.
Competed against the Holy Spirit inside of me.
Felt like I was only good for one thing.
Produced "bad fruit" proclaiming the Spirit was not in me.
Severed me as a limb from the tree of Life.
People made excuses for me.
Felt like an unanswered prayer that my Christian friends and family
were constantly praying for.
Let my eyes see filthy rotten things they never should have seen.
Let my heart beat for things it never should have loved.
Let my mind go filthy places it never should have gone.
Made life a game- I wanted to win, I wanted to score, I wanted to chase, nothing deeper.
Everything was gray, nothing was black and white or right and wrong- just depended on the circumstance.
Made people either friends or enemies- no forgiveness, no mercy, all out hatred.
Saw the worst in people and what they were lacking and also in myself.
JUDGED people.
I swore on the Holy Bible that I didn't do something I actually did- I lied under oath, blasphemed God.
Stirred up lust, made my brothers stumble.
That was old, I am NEW.
I want to be sober when my Savior returns.
I want to be ready "in the twinkling of an eye," I want to bow before my King, humbly,
just "ME."
One sip, one night, one phase just may lead to feeling/ doing any of the above OR may cause your sister/brother/ best friend/husband/wife/ gf/ bf to experience these things because you ENCOURAGED that drink. Where does my anger stem from? Who ever would have guessed!? When I see alcohol, smell it, feel it, THIS is where my mind goes- BACK to all those things I did; to that person that I WAS.
Praise God that REPENTANCE has wiped my slate clean! I AM a NEW creation. I AM secure in JUST being ME. 11 months, 12 days sober and getting further and further from where I've been.
1 Peter 3:4"...we've been given a brand-new life and have everything to live for, including a future in heaven—and the future starts now!"
Mark 3:28 "...There's nothing done or said that can't be forgiven. But if you persist in your slanders against God's Holy Spirit, you are repudiating the very One who forgives, sawing off the branch on which you're sitting, severing by your own perversity all connection with the One who forgives."
1 Peter 1:23 "...Your new life is not like your old life"
Galations 6:1 "If someone falls into sin, forgivingly restore him, saving your critical comments for yourself. You might be needing forgiveness before the day's out."
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