I'm watching "Facing the Giants," and as I come to tears, I realize one big thing... that God wants us to be content. He wants us to be faithful to him no matter what. He wants us to be okay with the yeses AND the no's. He wants us to love Him for giving us things and even when they are taken away. He wants us to say "I'll still love you."
It's amazing how many times we ask God for things or outcomes and we don't get it. We think because that dream has vanished, that opportunity passed, that relationship failed, etc that it's never going to happen. We think that's the end. We get angry, we get sad, we fall away, our hearts turn cold, or we give up on asking when God is really just seeing if we'll still love Him and if we'll be satisfied in Him alone.
I don't know how many times I did this same thing when I was younger. I didn't get my way or that toy or that wish and I threw a fit- an all out tantrum. I would slam doors, yell things I didn't mean, or become rigid and cold. SOMETIMES my parents had all intentions of GIVING me what I wanted or asked for, and sometimes a no meant no. What does it show about our attitude and hearts if we throw a hissy fit when God postpones the answer or shuts a door? What does it say about our faithfulness to God when we don't get what we asked for and we start putting boundaries on our trust and limits on God's abilities?
In the movie a guy refers to two farmers who prayed for rain, but only ONE prepared his fields for it. Then asks, "which one do you think had more faith?" If we focus so much on what God DIDN'T DO, we lose sight of what he's gonna do! And if we don't prepare for him to work through our lives and BELIEVE that He will, our faith may hinder us from seeing and experiencing Him fully.
God truly wants the BEST for us. God truly is the god who can turn death into life. God truly is the God who can move mountains. So who are we to undermine His plan and to get angry or upset when something we want is not in His will?
If we become content with the "no's," if we become okay with the "wait's," if we surrender what we think is best and honestly give him control... we will find God working in miraculous ways! It's just part of his plan. How much greater is the birth of a baby from a woman who was pronounced barren, how much more joy comes from a win after a lengthy series of losses, how much encouragement comes from hearing the weak overcoming, the anxious finding peace, the lonely finding love, the destroyed finding hope, the debtors finding financial freedom, etc.
I just encourage you to not get so down that you lose sight of God and how big of a god He is. And when you're asking God, prepare for the yes and the no, but also remember that Nothing is final with a God that GREAT. Nothing is over with a God that has a big plan for your life. Nothing is broken, used, or missing that God can't restore. Become content, that God will take care of you either way!
Thursday, May 20, 2010
Friday, May 14, 2010
Relationship Advice
From movies to magazines to real life, people are eager to give relationship advice. We want to accomplish goals, "find who we are," travel, establish a career, etc BEFORE we tie the knot. As the years go on, marriage becomes a "bad" thing- that gives us anxiety, adds debt, becomes emotionally draining, "a thing of the past," a trap, something you don't want to get into because your afraid of wanting to get out, etc. We are scared of DIVORCE so we want to make sure we found the "RIGHT" one. We want to make sure we are grounded before we engage in a relationship with "the one" or even start looking. We are so busy being IN THE WORLD- partying, clubbing, serial dating, going out with the girls, making money, becoming independent and self-sufficient, learning how to satisfy ourselves, buying things to make us feel prettier, happier, and of worth, that we put marriage off further and further.
Now I'm NOT saying it's not good to be single. I'm NOT saying that you need to concentrate on "finding the One." I just don't want people to see "Marriage" as a big scary monster that's coming to rob us of who we are, the fun we have, and the goals we worked so hard to get to.
MARRIAGE is supposed to be something that is placed up high, sacred, something that God himself designed to be the ultimate relationship before He comes. Intended to join two people to get through life together. To be intimate in every sense of the word. To have the most AMAZING sex. To be FREE in each other. To be a team. To better each other, to have support, to become who you were fully meant to be. Through life's valleys you'll have someone to go there with you, and when you get to life's mountain tops, you'll have someone to share it with. Someone that has your back, but can sweep you off your feet. It's more than dating, more than commitment, it's a union with the Father that is the Giver of all good things!
Now, when it comes to giving advice to my friends that DON'T HAVE A PERSONAL RELATIONSHIP with Jesus Christ, all of this becomes void. You can't take only PART of the Bible, you can't only do half of what He says. You can't be sexually active and pray together and say you're living for God. Yes, you will mess up, and yes you are not perfect, but if you KNOW that it is wrong, if the Bible says it's wrong, if your wise and godly counsel say it's wrong, and you CONTINUE to do it, you are living in sin and therefore, out of God's will. So if you ask me for advice on your relationship, my answer is ALWAYS going to be "get your personal relationship with the Lord on track, as strong and intimate as it can possibly be" or "get on the same page with God."
I truly believe that when you give your heart to the Lord, once and for all- no take backs, when you surrender YOUR will, when you say 'Lord, I want all of you, totally and fully,' when you are willing to give up your boyfriend, your friends, your drug of choice, your job, your money, etc and READ and PRAY EVERYDAY, only THEN can you be preparing for MARRIAGE.
God has a plan designed for your life. You have a biological clock that IS ticking. I KNOW that when you draw near to God, and LISTEN, he will show you his plan. He will put desires in you that align with His will. I guarantee you that He is NOT going to say "you need to date more people", "make more money", or "be more independent", when the Bible teaches to "guard your heart," "be content," and to "become one with your husband."
We get so BUSY, and we want to RUSH things, we want anything and everything the world says is "IN." We are SO much in the world, that we forget we are supposed to be "in it but not of it." We need to remove ourselves from it, if we get so sucked in by the garbage. Turn off your tv, get off facebook, stop watching romance movies and getting Cosmo magazines... and get into a quiet place, on your knees, in the Word, and pray.
When I gave my life completely over to the Lord, for good, I put "away my childish ways." As I got closer to Him, I became more sanctified, more AWARE of my SIN. And he gave me NEW goals, NEW desires, NEW things to live for. It became where nothing else mattered, whether I got married, whether I stayed single, whether I had friends, or whether I was just with my God, I was content. He started PREPARING me to be "marriage material." He started breaking my strongholds, getting in deep, helping me see how I needed to change.
Now that I am at that point of getting married, I KNOW that it is God's will for me. No one can tell me I'm too young, it was too fast, or I don't make enough money, or I need to experience more... I have HEARD from the Lord that this is His will. I have FASTED and I've Prayed, sought wise and godly counsel, I have taken on the struggle to remain pure, and when I slip, I repent and get back on track... We are seeking the Lord in our ministry and in our future household.
I believe that the world can't give you a number, a formula, an age, a "type," a checklist, or anything else that says you're ready for marriage. Nor can you judge someone else for getting married IF they are walking and talking with the Lord. But as for advice, I believe if someone asks, you may give sound advice and godly counsel if you are walking with the Lord and have PRAYED about it and the one that is considering marriage is not.
All of this goes to say, that when you are looking for relationship advice... go to God.. go to the word.. and then go seek godly counsel. Check your relationship with the Lord and see if you are doing ALL you can for HIM, and He will DIRECT your path. He will align your desires with his own, and then you can be SURE your are living your life in the TIMING of His WILL and not according to the world.
Ecc. 3:1
"There's an opportune time to do things, a right time for everything on the earth"
Now I'm NOT saying it's not good to be single. I'm NOT saying that you need to concentrate on "finding the One." I just don't want people to see "Marriage" as a big scary monster that's coming to rob us of who we are, the fun we have, and the goals we worked so hard to get to.
MARRIAGE is supposed to be something that is placed up high, sacred, something that God himself designed to be the ultimate relationship before He comes. Intended to join two people to get through life together. To be intimate in every sense of the word. To have the most AMAZING sex. To be FREE in each other. To be a team. To better each other, to have support, to become who you were fully meant to be. Through life's valleys you'll have someone to go there with you, and when you get to life's mountain tops, you'll have someone to share it with. Someone that has your back, but can sweep you off your feet. It's more than dating, more than commitment, it's a union with the Father that is the Giver of all good things!
Now, when it comes to giving advice to my friends that DON'T HAVE A PERSONAL RELATIONSHIP with Jesus Christ, all of this becomes void. You can't take only PART of the Bible, you can't only do half of what He says. You can't be sexually active and pray together and say you're living for God. Yes, you will mess up, and yes you are not perfect, but if you KNOW that it is wrong, if the Bible says it's wrong, if your wise and godly counsel say it's wrong, and you CONTINUE to do it, you are living in sin and therefore, out of God's will. So if you ask me for advice on your relationship, my answer is ALWAYS going to be "get your personal relationship with the Lord on track, as strong and intimate as it can possibly be" or "get on the same page with God."
I truly believe that when you give your heart to the Lord, once and for all- no take backs, when you surrender YOUR will, when you say 'Lord, I want all of you, totally and fully,' when you are willing to give up your boyfriend, your friends, your drug of choice, your job, your money, etc and READ and PRAY EVERYDAY, only THEN can you be preparing for MARRIAGE.
God has a plan designed for your life. You have a biological clock that IS ticking. I KNOW that when you draw near to God, and LISTEN, he will show you his plan. He will put desires in you that align with His will. I guarantee you that He is NOT going to say "you need to date more people", "make more money", or "be more independent", when the Bible teaches to "guard your heart," "be content," and to "become one with your husband."
We get so BUSY, and we want to RUSH things, we want anything and everything the world says is "IN." We are SO much in the world, that we forget we are supposed to be "in it but not of it." We need to remove ourselves from it, if we get so sucked in by the garbage. Turn off your tv, get off facebook, stop watching romance movies and getting Cosmo magazines... and get into a quiet place, on your knees, in the Word, and pray.
When I gave my life completely over to the Lord, for good, I put "away my childish ways." As I got closer to Him, I became more sanctified, more AWARE of my SIN. And he gave me NEW goals, NEW desires, NEW things to live for. It became where nothing else mattered, whether I got married, whether I stayed single, whether I had friends, or whether I was just with my God, I was content. He started PREPARING me to be "marriage material." He started breaking my strongholds, getting in deep, helping me see how I needed to change.
Now that I am at that point of getting married, I KNOW that it is God's will for me. No one can tell me I'm too young, it was too fast, or I don't make enough money, or I need to experience more... I have HEARD from the Lord that this is His will. I have FASTED and I've Prayed, sought wise and godly counsel, I have taken on the struggle to remain pure, and when I slip, I repent and get back on track... We are seeking the Lord in our ministry and in our future household.
I believe that the world can't give you a number, a formula, an age, a "type," a checklist, or anything else that says you're ready for marriage. Nor can you judge someone else for getting married IF they are walking and talking with the Lord. But as for advice, I believe if someone asks, you may give sound advice and godly counsel if you are walking with the Lord and have PRAYED about it and the one that is considering marriage is not.
All of this goes to say, that when you are looking for relationship advice... go to God.. go to the word.. and then go seek godly counsel. Check your relationship with the Lord and see if you are doing ALL you can for HIM, and He will DIRECT your path. He will align your desires with his own, and then you can be SURE your are living your life in the TIMING of His WILL and not according to the world.
Ecc. 3:1
"There's an opportune time to do things, a right time for everything on the earth"
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